Free to Be: Are We More Inclusive, or More Divided?
For as long as I can remember, community has been our greatest strength. We’ve fought together, marched together, and built spaces where we could exist, thrive, and celebrate who we are. That’s why this year’s Sydney Gay and Lesbian Free to Be theme feels so significant. It speaks to the heart of what we stand for — the right to be ourselves, to define our own identities, to live without fear.
But lately, I’ve found myself questioning: Are we truly becoming more inclusive, or is our community fracturing in ways we never saw coming?
Over the past few years, there’s been growing debate over how we define our community. Some advocate for dropping the LGBTQIA+ acronym entirely in favour of “queer” as a unifying term. Others push in the opposite direction — separating identities and even stripping away letters. Just this month, we saw the TQ removed from the Stonewall Monument in the US — and what shocked me most was that many LGB people supported it.
For decades, our communities have stood together, advocating side by side for visibility, rights, and understanding. While same-sex attraction and gender identity bring unique experiences, does that mean our paths should diverge? As conversations evolve, are we witnessing a natural progression — or could we be losing sight of the strength that comes from our shared solidarity?
A Community That No Longer Feels Like One?
In my work across marketing, media, and now launching a startup, I’ve learned that when you try to appeal to everyone, you often end up reaching no one. This Mardi Gras, that disconnect was impossible to ignore.
Ask a gay man if they were going to the afterparty? “No, we’re going to Kylie and Daywash.” was pretty much the universal response.
Ask a lesbian? “No, we’re only doing Ultra Violet.”
Ask younger queer and gender-nonconforming people? “We can’t afford it — we live in Sydney! We’ll be at Poof Doof… or just loitering on the street with our friends.”
Ask someone from an older generation? “Mardi Gras has lost its way. I’m not paying to go listen to people I’ve never heard of, at a venue half the capacity it used to be.”
One of the biggest LGBTQIA+ celebrations of the year no longer seemed to speak to the very people it was built for. Have we stretched things so far that we’ve lost the ability to create spaces that feel like home? Or have we forgotten to celebrate the dazzling diversity of our community in all its forms?
As a Mind Out Champion for LGBTIQ+ Health Australia, I’ve seen first-hand how inclusive language, visibility, and representation can literally change — and save — lives. The words we choose, the spaces we create, and the way we bring people together matters. The LGBTQIA+ community has always been a kaleidoscope, each person reflecting something unique and beautiful. But this year, it felt like the light behind that kaleidoscope had dimmed.
We don’t need to shrink or divide ourselves to fit into a single, one-size-fits-all narrative. We need to keep that light shining — brighter than ever — because in a world that is becoming increasingly hostile, our strength is in our visibility, our unity, and our ability to celebrate every facet of who we are.
Mardi Gras has always been a space for joy, resistance, and connection. But if we want it to stay that way, how do we make sure no one gets left behind?
A Tipping Point in a MAGA World
Beyond our community, the political landscape is shifting in ways that should have us all paying attention. With Trump settling into his second term, we’re already seeing hard-won LGBTQIA+ rights being rolled back in the US. Anti-trans laws are sweeping across states, and conservative rhetoric is gaining traction globally.
Now, more than ever, we need to ask ourselves what kind of community we want to be. Do we let these external pressures divide us into factions, or do we hold onto the solidarity that has carried us this far?
I love being a gay man. I love my lesbian friends, my trans sisters and brothers, my bi mates, my non-binary peers. I still consider them all part of my community. But lately, I don’t feel free to be — not in the way we once were. The world is quickly changing, and not necessarily for the better. I’ve heard things spoken out loud that I never thought I’d hear again, seen people emboldened to push back on progress, as if equality was ever up for debate.
The Free to Be theme feels more loaded than ever because it forces us to ask — are we? Are we truly free to be ourselves without fear? Or is that freedom quietly slipping away while we aren’t looking? Now is not the time to turn inward or pull apart at the seams. Now is the time to stand shoulder to shoulder and refuse to let the tides of history roll backward.
I don’t have all the answers. But I know this — I feel lucky to live in Australia. And when election time comes, I hope we don’t blindly follow the path of division we’re seeing unfold elsewhere.
Where do you stand?
Do you feel more connected to the LGBTQIA+ community than ever, or does it feel like something is shifting? I'd love to hear your thoughts!